When my husband and I kept postponing our honeymoon in favor of other obligations, I realized it was time to talk honestly about what we both needed in our relationship.
We’ve been married for over three years now. It’s a span of time that has included so much growth, so many challenges, and countless beautiful moments. I remember our wedding day like it was yesterday—how we dreamed of starting our married life with a honeymoon, a special trip just for the two of us.
But life has a way of adjusting our plans. Only a few months into our marriage, we became parents. At the same time, my husband, Ethan, was enrolled in an intense educational program. We both agreed the honeymoon would have to wait. And that made sense. We were juggling parenting, studying, and new responsibilities.
Still, over time, I started to feel a quiet sense of longing. Not for a specific destination, but for the time together we had once promised ourselves. We had talked about it often, saying “maybe next year” or “when things settle down.” But somehow, the years slipped by.
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### **Noticing the Pattern**
While our shared trip stayed on hold, I began noticing how easily Ethan could plan other kinds of travel—weekends with friends, bachelor parties, weddings out of state. He would always find a way to make those events happen, and I could see how much he valued those experiences.
I absolutely understood that these moments were important to him, and I supported his desire to be there for his friends. But somewhere along the way, I started to feel like we hadn’t given the same attention to our own shared dream. Every time the topic of our honeymoon came up, it seemed to be brushed aside—not out of unkindness, but simply because other things seemed more urgent.
It wasn’t about comparing or keeping score. It was about balance. I just wanted us to share in the excitement of making time for each other again.
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### **A Conversation That Changed Things**
As another trip approached—this time a destination celebration for a close friend—I felt it was time to have a heartfelt conversation. I didn’t want to wait for a perfect moment. I just needed to express what I was feeling.
That evening, I gently shared my thoughts with Ethan. I told him I wasn’t upset about any single trip. Instead, I explained how I missed the feeling of being part of something we were building together. I missed the sense of anticipation we once had about doing something special just for us.
To my relief, Ethan listened openly. He didn’t become defensive. In fact, he was thoughtful and kind in his response. He told me he hadn’t realized how much the delay had affected me, and that it wasn’t intentional. He explained that he had been focused on many moving parts in life, but he truly cared about our relationship and our time together.
He said something that stuck with me: “I want to get back to us. Let’s figure this out together.”
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### **Moving Forward, Side by Side**
That conversation was a turning point—not because it solved everything, but because it opened the door. We agreed to start making intentional time for each other, not just someday, but now. We didn’t rush into booking a big trip. Instead, we began rebuilding the habit of checking in with each other, planning small moments, and reestablishing shared priorities.
Eventually, we planned our long-awaited honeymoon. It wasn’t extravagant. It was peaceful, relaxed, and filled with the kind of quiet joy we had both been missing. We spent time talking, laughing, and appreciating how far we’d come—not just in miles, but in understanding.
**What We Learned**
Looking back, I realized something powerful: it wasn’t really about a trip. It was about the act of showing up for one another. About listening without judgment. About remembering that a strong relationship is built one moment at a time.
Today, we both try to be more mindful of that balance—making space for family, friendships, responsibilities, and also for each other.
And that has made all the difference.
